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All anyone truly has are their thoughts, and these are mine. I find it harder every day to believe in coincidence, so if you've found these writings, I encourage you to read on. Experience is a two-way street, and I'd appreciate hearing about yours. Love.

Thursday, 16 December 2010

I can't hear you!

Wondering on the reasons, I begin the tales of Mud with unnecessary reluctance.

A poem.

My name provokes rest and restlessness,
but I am heard by none.
My scream is said to be deafeningly peaceful,
but I am heard by none.
My name is feared yet craved,
but I am unknown.
My name does no justice to my being.
I am not.

One of my greatest fears was being trapped, and alone. I tried to imagine what it would be like completely alone in a pitch black room. What I would see. What I would hear. What I would feel. 

What I would see excited me! Anything that excited my visual sense has always been appreciated. As for hearing, I immediately thought of the sound of silence. Contemplating the word's meaning, I realized that our concept of silence 'does no justice' to it's literal meaning.

On this thought, I realized that I was still not alone. The sound would accompany me even if the place I was trapped in had a one hundred thousand kilometer radius. No matter where I was located, the screaming sound would be there. Is this what sparked the fear in my chest?  Was my own understanding of what I was afraid of clouded by a misunderstanding of a word? Was I more scared of being trapped with something, than being trapped alone?

I think on the basic impossibility that no human will ever know silence, ever. After this realization, I am enticed by the experience of true silence. To not hear the sound of those high pitched rings would please me; like music to my ears.

But how to experience this?

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